For many, the holiday season is a time of happiness—spent with friends and family, sharing traditions, gifts, and laughter. Yet for others, it can bring inner struggles. Holiday gatherings often come with pressure: to show affection, adjust routines, attend social events, or eat unfamiliar foods. These challenges can be especially difficult for those recovering from traumatic experiences. The season’s heightened expectations can add stress, and for individuals in or recovering from abusive relationships, it may trigger a mix of complex emotions.
According to the CDC, 1 in 4 women and 1 in 10 men will experience an abusive relationship during their lifetime. The contrast between such experiences and the festive joy surrounding the holidays can be deeply isolating. So how can you protect yourself or others emotionally during this time? One crucial step is setting and respecting healthy boundaries.
Respect Boundaries for All—Children and Adults
Healthy relationships thrive on principles like independence, equality, trust, honesty, and fun—all of which require boundaries. At Turning Points Network (TPN), we teach young people that boundaries apply to all relationships, not just romantic ones. Friends, family, partners, co-workers, and children all benefit from boundaries rooted in mutual respect.
Practicing respectful boundaries during the holidays can help reduce stress for both adults and children. Everyone has boundaries—whether about personal space, comfort levels, or how they spend their time—and these deserve to be honored.
The holidays also offer opportunities to reinforce boundaries with children. Kids are always learning by observing the adults around them. For example, if a child doesn’t want to sit on Santa’s lap, honor their “no” and suggest an alternative activity. Similarly, avoid pressuring children to hug, kiss, or show physical affection to gift-givers. These actions affirm that their bodies belong to them and lay the groundwork for lifelong body safety.
Practice Kindness Toward Yourself
The holiday season often comes with a whirlwind of emotions, expectations, and stress. It’s okay to admit this time of year can be difficult. Acknowledge how past toxic or traumatic relationships may affect your well-being. Share your feelings with someone you trust and remember that support is available through organizations like Turning Points Network or local mental health services. You don’t have to face these challenges alone. By prioritizing self-care, you not only nurture your own well-being but also set a powerful example for your loved ones.
Give the Gift of Empathy
The holidays can create unrealistic expectations. What you want or need may differ from the desires of those around you, leading to tension. This season offers a chance to practice healthy communication and conflict resolution.
Empathy helps us see situations from others’ perspectives. By openly sharing your feelings, listening to others’ needs, and collaborating on a plan to enjoy time together, you can alleviate some of the holiday stress. Honesty, understanding, and flexibility go a long way in creating a more joyful season for everyone.
If you are experiencing abuse or know someone who is, contact Turning Points Network at 800-639-3130. We are here to listen and help. You’ll find safety, support, and respect as you explore your options.
OUR TURN is a public service series by Turning Points Network (TPN), serving all of Sullivan County with offices in Claremont and Newport. We provide comprehensive support for survivors of domestic and sexual abuse, stalking, and sex trafficking. Additionally, we offer violence-prevention education programs in local schools and community.
For more than 40 years, TPN has helped individuals of all ages break free from the cycle of abuse, providing the tools and support needed to rebuild their lives with strength, dignity, and hope for the future. To learn more, call us at 800-639-3130, visit www.turningpointsnetwork.org, or connect with us on Facebook.
